I recently went to a dinner party attended by some of my nearest and dearest friends. Always a nice pick-me-up, especially considering we haven’t all been together in spot in a very long time. What made this dinner a different was was a +1 affair. Everyone was encouraged to bring their significant other and after dinner there would be some party games. Although it probably didn’t stick out to my friends, I was the odd man out with no +1 to accompany me. I have no significant other, no major romantic love interest… nada.
I had a fun time and my lack of accompaniment was a total non-issue for the night. However, it did provoke some thoughts about love, relationships and romantically involved significant others. I’ve come to realise (a long while ago actually) that my views on love are quite different than the norm. These views that tend to stop me from the desire to pursue romantic endeavours with absolute seriousness.
My main views are this:
- I don’t believe in someone being my “better half” or completing me
- I think it’s totally possible to have more than 1 “soulmate” and not have said soulmate be someone you’re romantically involved with
- I do value the ideals of companionship and love but… meh, I’m lazy.
I think for these reasons, I find myself not much into dating. Any when I do date… it doesn’t end well (HAHAHA!). Most people I mention some of these views to tend think it’s because I haven’t been in a serious relationship or found “true love”. And you know what, this could be very true! But at the same time, I feel like North American social norms keep telling me that I need to find someone to start a family with (-_-)…
I chalk up my viewpoints on love/relationships to a few things in my life. I’m a super introverted & independent person. The type of person who would go without if I couldn’t do something on my own. I don’t really see myself being “fulfilled” by being with someone’s husband & dad. Those are titles I may have one day but would never solely define myself with… at least not in this point in time.
Am I jaded? Am I going against the flow? Have I just not found “the one” yet?
I guess time will tell…